A place to learn, discuss and pray about what it means to be single in mission. This can be for mission-minded individuals who feel called to be single, for those seeking to find a 'mission partner' and those who want to encourage single folk.

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Related Links

OSCAR Article: 'Called to be Single?' by Fiona Cooper


'Single Mission' by Debbie Hawker & Tim Herbert

'Missionary Singles Issues' by Ronald L. Koteskey

Christian Singles Websites





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  • Thanks for the comment. We've adjusted these links now :-)

  • This website link seems defunct.


    Also I wonder about the www.click2date.co.uk one?

    (Just because we are single, doesn't mean we want a date? LOL)

  • Anyone want to help with a matchmaking project for single missionaries? See http://www.redemptionblog.com/missionmate

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  • Thanks Belinda!

  • Feel free to share that with anyone, Tim.  And Jim, it would never have been expertly addressed as I did below were it not for an extensive discussion within our regional network years ago to arrive at something to say.

  • Belinda, Right on target. This is essentially what I do, although not usually quite as expertly as you express below.

  • Belinda, I love it!  What a powerful response.  Would you have any objection to me sharing that with others?

  • As for the identity issue for single women that Jim mentioned a couple of years ago (yikes!?) now, I found the issue to be similarly problematic serving in SE Asia among cousins there also.  In that culture, to be single and female past a certain age meant that (a) there was something "wrong" with you or (b) you were selfish.  At one of our network meetings we discussed the issue at length and came up with a marvelous solution - something to say that was truthful and gave the locals something good to gossip about us ladies.  

    Whenever asked why we weren't married, we'd answer something like this:  

    "Why, I'd love to have been married, but you see, I had this dream.  I dreamed that I was here in this place serving the people here.  Now I believe that this dream was from God. [To which all present would readily nod in agreement, as that is commonly held belief among my focus people.]  And I really wanted to obey the dream.  And I knew that if I married and had a family, I would never be able to come here and serve your people and obey God.  Now, if I were find someone who had the same dream as I, I'd be happy to marry him.  Do you know of anyone who has the same dream as I?"  

    After that, if anyone did try to introduce someone to me as a candidate (usually a non-believer), I would simply ask him, "So what have you been doing the past 10 years?  Oh!  You don't have the same dream as me!  Sorry, but I must obey God's dream."

    Now, I'm not some weirdo or selfish person, but someone to be revered in the community as a God-fearer.  Cool, eh?

  • Here's a marvelous article I found particularly encouraging.  http://bit.ly/KNjmh0

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Going and Growing

Dear all,At next year's European Member Care Consultation (http://www.membercare.eu/emcc-10/) I have the privilege of doing a plenary on "Going and Growing as a Single".  It's a great opportunity to tell a wide range of church and mission agency executives and member care workers how they can support the spiritual and emotional growth of singles as we go in mission.  So what would be the message you would like to give them?  What has been your experience of 'growing'?  Has your growth been…

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What's the best advice you've ever been given?

Years ago, I was in a church which put terrific pressure on young people to marry as soon as possible and treated long-term singles as 'failures'.  I was finding it really difficult to deal with, as I felt this was really unbiblical, but at the same time, I felt like a rebel for standing up for spinsterhood!  An elderly spinster who had been my grandmother's best friend asked me if I was 'dating'.  When I said no, she looked me straight in the eye and said 'Never marry until you meet someone…

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4 Replies

Holiday Ideas

What kind of holidays do you like to take, do you enjoy travelling alone, do you usually find a friend who enjoys the same sort of holiday to go with do you like going on organised holidays and meeting new people? I think personally my favorite type of holiday when I need a good rest is to go and stay with a good friend or family ... it's much harder though to find someone to go exploring somewhere different with. How about you?!

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1 Reply

Singles networking websites

There's been a long silence in the Talking Singleness group, here's my attempt to break it!What do think about missionaries joining Christian Singles/Dating web sites? Good idea or waste of time?Look forward to hearing your views! -)

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2 Replies